I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
