honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
