dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
