Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
