Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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