is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Randomize
