YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I just found a bag of teeth...
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
