Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
