the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
You are the jesus of drinking
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize