i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize