wanna go halves on a baby?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
