Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
