why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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