I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
