Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Randomize
