the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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