I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
