Define "chronic" masturbator.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
