i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
