ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
