Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
