It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
