So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
