We got so high we made milksteak
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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