May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
