u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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