Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
