oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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