we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
