Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
