i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Randomize
