Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
