dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
