How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
