My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
