Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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