Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
