i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
