i barfeds in our rink
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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