Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
