Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Still dying that you shit outside
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
