he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
