So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
