she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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