Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
