just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize