i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
