Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
