If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
