i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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